Broken - Evanescence

TUES. MAY 24

Why is making the final decision of whether or not to stay here another 6 months so hard? I mean everything pretty much is lined up perfectly for me to stay here:
-parents are supportive of the idea
-they have enough money to send me here
-dad sent me phone numbers for places i need to call to change my ticket
-i like meeting new people
-the subjects that I want to learn about (Revelation, Minor Prophets,etc.) are going to be lectured on next semester
-my 2 fav lecturers are coming back (Ray Andrews & Lew Meyer) are coming back

But there's still a part of me that wants to go home because:
-i'm scared my friends won't understand my decision (that's a big one)
-i want to go home
-i want to go back to work (Eddie Bauer)
-I want to drive my car

I know I know, those sound like really dumb reasons to go home, so that means I should stay right? Well the decision is still hard.

I've been talking with some friends about this and this is a piece of advice that I was given "If God give you a green light, go with Him until He gives you a red light." Well the actual quote was something like that, but you get the basic jist of it. So I think today I'll hand in my Visa to get the dates changed and maybe call up some travel agents and see what i get changed. Aaaaa! This is such a big step! There's no for sure's yet....i"m just still gathering information.

Ok visa is in the office's possession right now (well it's actually my passport and they deal with the visa stuff) and now I've got the same forms that i filled out before i came here dealing with Visa applications and bank statements and what not. *Oh dad, you'll probably recieve a fax in the near future talking about bank statements. You'll know what I mean when you see it :)*

Well everyone just pray that if it's God's will that I stay here that everything will just work out nicely so that I don't have to worry about it all. Thanx :)